I am still undecided...

UNIVERSITY... LIFE!! REALITY!! coming closer and closer
yet it didn't completely hit me yet...

I still don't know yet... I mean a have a basic idea of what I might pursue... Here are my ideas at the moment...

• ER 
• Commerce
• Nursing
• Dentistry 
• Forensic or DNA tech 

But the thing is... Will I regret? Will it be a wrong choice? Will I get that far? Questions that I constantly ask myself. If I get into nursing I might try to take it one step further and go for ER and if I don't I can always go back to nursing. The thing is though the ER program here in Manitoba sucks.. (apparently) and is recommended to take it else where like UBC, university of Toronto or Queens. Same with Forensic... Have to go to Carleton.. The program is not even offered here... sigh.. what to do with life?  

What I want to do this summer

• job or volunteer at the zoo
• folkrama
• part time stable job
• volunteer at HSC or seven oaks hospital
• get drivers license !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so determined.... :@ IT ANGERS ME.  
• exercise... get fit again!! PLEASEEEEE 

Today, surprisingly was a pretty good day.

Sure I was off to a rough start last night and this morning but overall I must say it was pretty good. Went bowling with my siblings for a Chinese School related activity only to find myself and my sister put in a group with little kids. One was even younger than my bro... >.> At the end they were fun to play with though and we had team spirit and cheered for one another when we got strikes and spares. I admire that spirit. It's odd because sometimes that spirit does not even exist with some of my closest people. Another highlight being my brother. LOL He is so funny sometimes! At that bowling location they have nicknames already set up for you. We asked bro which nickname he wants and he said "Lucky" Sis looks at the screen but lucky wasn't there so bro said "THE SECOND ONE!" LOOL the nickname for the second one was LUCY LOOOOL! When it was bro's turn one of the parents there was like "go lucy!" IT WAS TOO FUNNY! But yeah won with a score of 106.... ^_^

Volunteer was okay today. It wasn't as crazy as I thought it would be. Sometimes if I actually talk to the little kids they actually talk to you which I like. Some of them just completely ignores you though... >.> RUDE.

This summer I want to volunteer at more places and get a job to pay for university.

The feeling he gives me... <3

good day at school with him..

Good morning world

Woke up to a rainy morning weather mood... I find it somewhat inspiring.

I wonder what today has to offer me... Good or bad bring it on. I shall face it

On sunday...

I put my playlist on shuffle and came across a song that I haven't listen to for awhile.

柯有綸 - don't say goodbye (美味關係) sweet relationship OST

主唱：柯有綸
作曲：柯有綸
填詞：柯有綸

看著你哭的時候特別奇怪
想給的安慰總是說不出來
為何這愛總是拼湊不起來
現在的你為何笑的那麼愉快
因為你　我可以永遠在這等待
因為你　我不會再悲哀

Don’t Say Goodbye　我還不想離開
Don’t Say Goodbye　能不能從頭再來
Don’t Say Goodbye　這一切開始的太快
讓我靜靜一個在這發呆

Don’t Say Goodbye　我還不想離開
Don’t Say Goodbye　能不能從頭再來
Don’t Say Goodbye　請不要忘記我的愛
讓我靜靜一個在這發呆　不想離開

Since then this song engraved itself within my mind.

happy birthday my love (even though it was yesterday) 


I hope you had a great one with many more years to come. I love you

It's almost his birthday :) MY MAN <3

His peace sign !! So adorable

how dearly I miss him already...

I got in trouble for going out late but honestly I don’t care. I would trade anything to receive his kiss once again, to feel his arms embraced around me and to feel his hands interlocking with my hands or to see those beautiful eyes of his or his gentle heart-warming cheesy smile. This guy… I realized that he is more to me than just forever he is my destiny, my air, my oxygen. If he is gone I am gone too. This guy is my heart and he keeps it beating and so I live.

I thought that our faith has ended when I appeared at Tyndall and he was not present. I wanted to scream out his name but only to find tears falling down from my eyes. As sad as I was I did not return home. Instead I walked along the path that we have once set foot upon, our footsteps side by side and shadow by shadow. How greatly I realized the changes that we have experience from both positive and negative. I walked to the bleaches where we once sat and saw a fire truck. I gaze towards the hill that we once sat together with his arm around me for the very first time. How I miss those simple days… As we move forward together in life I feel that more problems have arisen between us and at the same time I feel that I honestly cannot lose this guy ever and as each day forwards its step I feel myself falling harder for him each and every time. A bunch of emotions fills the air that I was breathing and I felt that I no longer want to live this life with meaning anymore as the one that gives me meaning no longer defines me. A guy comes into view and without my glasses everything was such a blur. Scared and sad as I was already I decided to head towards the opposite direction only to feel a sense of familiarity. I decided to look more closely and find myself staring into the guy that I thought I would never have again. I ran towards him and hold him close only to find tears once again but this time is was tears of happiness because my happiness has once again appeared in front of my eyes. I do not ever want to let him go. Wherever he goes I will try my best to follow. If he decides to go to Toronto I will go with him. As long as I’m walking with him my path is a never ending path full of happiness and eternity.   

I was surfing online and I came across this

*You feel worthless, unimportant, and useless.
*You feel like you simply cannot do anything right.
*You do not feel needed, and maybe not even loved.
*You feel like people wouldn't miss if you if you disappeared, or that they would get over your departure quickly.
*You feel empty inside--like something huge is missing but you cannot pinpoint it.
*You feel like your best will never be good enough because YOU are not good enough.
*You feel like nobody is genuinely interested in you and what you have to offer (though you may feel that you don't have much to offer)

YAY done English... okay accounting is next on the list

WTH ... runny nose again :((((

IT SUCKS! HATE IT. GROSS especially in class when it's all quiet and you're just sniffing....
Determined to go to bed early tonight

#nowplaying 0330- U-Kiss ... the memories...  "Don't deny our  r²π "

I still got to...

• buy a graduation dress
• pay for graduation clothing
• book road test :SSSS
• make an appointment for graduation photos..
• get a job!!

What I want to get done tonight:

1. Deconstruction paragraph
2. Accounting homework
3. Physics worksheet and the three odd questions
4. Review for psychology test on Tuesday
5. Start hunger games
6. Get physics review ready for test on Thursday 
7. watch kony 

And if there is time left

1. Chinese Homework 

Let's get to it ! 

Search Me O God

Last night our Chamber Choir sang this song at the music festival and I really like the tone of it and the feel. haha one of those songs that makes me think.

I miss blogging...

I will keep this up to date once I'm all caught up. I seriously need to time manage better and balance everything.

2R Shining Friends -Lyrics

A little faith brightens are rainy day
Life is difficult you can go away
Don't hide yourselves in a corner
You have my place to stay
Sorrow is gonna say goodbye
Opens up you see the happy sunshine
Keep going on with your dream
Chasing tomorrow sunrise
The spirit can never die
Sun will shine my friend
Won't let you cry my dear
Seeing you she'd the tear
Makes my world disappear
You'll never be alone in darkness
See my smile my friend
We are with you holding hands
You have got to believe
You are my destiny
We're meant to be your friends
That's what a friend should be

Surprises

I miss my boyfriend

I’ve never had such feelings for anyone before. I love him I honestly do with my whole heart. Yet, I feel I don’t deserve such a great guy like him. Am I really worth it, to give up something that you have always wanted something that you want to experience? Like dang… It would kill me so much to lose you. I can’t imagine a life without you in it. Yet I want you to fulfill your dreams and hopes. I love you. Although our dreams may not cross the same path but any path I take I hope it leads back to you. Because I truly believe that you are my destiny. The feelings I get when I see you, when you hug me, kiss me, and when you say “I love you.” That sharp cut I get in my heart when you tell me you’re not feeling well, when I don’t see you at school and when you’re sad. I love you. I want you to be happy and smile when you wake up every morning to the beautiful sunshine, a cloudy morning, a drizzling morning or a snowy morning. I want to shovel the snow with you every morning before we go to work and mown the lawn in the summer, or walk our dog name Pluto while strolling beside each other, eating cream cones and embracing each other’s hands. I want to wake up to your breakfast every morning and when you come home I will have dinner prepared for you and hang your coat in the closet. I want to watch movies with you all night long and just fall asleep on each other in each other’s arm. I want to have a candle light dinner with you in our cozy house and look through the box that I gave you filled with memories from the past, and laugh and smile at each other because of the happiness that is indulged within our heart. I love you. Will this all become a reality one day? When our dreams and hopes are different? Is this just another story that can only come true if I write it into a book? I love the story of us because you’re the main character in my story.

The weather seems so nice out right now. I wish we can go for walk. I miss you a whole lot.  

I don't know why but looking up serial killers are interesting