ohhkay weird. Just weird. The minute I posted my last entry he messaged me on msn... OHHKAY that is just REALLY REALLLY weird.. like OMMGG Just weird......

It's gonna be a long/ exciting day tomorrow :)))) In the morning going to st.vital with cousin, sister and Jhemily. My friends are coming after!!! YAYA

Playing UNO with Jeff right now LOL

My DAD!!

I seriously think my dad is over protective sometimes! It was funny/awkward last night. After I came home my sister told me that my dad was walking around the living room holding a hockey stick. I find that quite funny. LOL Like I can totally see him doing that LMAO  :P Also I can't stay out past 10 now. (sad life) and I have to leave the phone number to that person's house I'm going too. Next time if I go to the movies past 10 he is going to join us and sit in the back row. That is somewhat awkward... BUT funny the way my mom said it!!

So apparently I got an award. Two actually. I seriously think Sisler hates me LOL Like they never ever call me!! Like two years in a row. I find that funny too. I never show up for it :P xDD

It's so nice out today and I'm stuck inside. Going to go out tomorrow with cousin. Last hangout with her before she heads for New York for the rest of the summer. My friend Trisha is also going on her trip today. I hope they both have safe trips.

I wonder how's he doing lately. He still comes across my mind once in awhile. I seriously don't think I'll ever understand him.. At this point it doesn't really matters any more. I don't even know what happened but I accept it. It's like... I don't even know what its like. I can't put it into words. So yea, I like the way my life is right now minus the things that I still cannot decide on. Life is simple. Even though those times with him was really something but I know it won't last long. It was never meant to last or start. Things will get better. If it doesn't get better than its not the end. We don't talk any more but I admit even if we don't talk I still think about him. But I think everything is ohhkay now? I don't even want to think about it any more. I'm just gonna live life. PEACE :)

Random last minute plans with friends yesterday and it was awesome! We went to Tyndall and we just sat and talked there. After we went to my place well my yard.. LOL

So last night we went out to watch x-men at 10:00pm. IT WAS AWESOME!! I mean going out so late. Driving around the streets at night with so little traffic. Its cool 8) It might be my first and last time D: My dad stayed up waiting for me last night. I felt bad... D: The movie was pretty interesting I must say. It's not a movie that I would watch though but there is a first time for everything. I actually thought it was interesting. Too bad I had to wake up early this morning to go get my report card / check my time table. My marks weren't bad. I'm surprised that I pass chemistry!! :D But I went down in English D: SO SAD!!! Makes my report card look bad. I actually kinda like my schedule next year. It's somewhat hardcore but I think I can handle it if I time manage it well. ( which I don't) but I shall try. I want to fill in my random spare in second semester and switch physics to enriched. Then it would be a good schedule :)

Possible time table right now
Semester one:
Pre-calculus
Chemistry
Pre-calculus/ Gym
English

Semester 2:
Spare. ( wanna fill it )
Calculus ( as if I got this class -_- )
Trans Focus English
Physics ( want to switch to enriched)

And of course. Choir the entire year :D

WHAT A SUPER DUPER BORING DAY

I kind of have a headache from sleeping too late last night. ): Oh well. But I woke up at 12 this morning. Honestly I wish my brother would be quiet in the morning. It's so fricken annoying. My parents went to superstore this morning so I was home alone with sister. All I did was practice piano. After that I watched into thin air on tv. Why is my life so boring? D: I have like no direction in life. I never know what I want. It's like I want to do something but at the same time I don't. I want to finish this stupid swimming redo but at the same time I'm lazy. I want to take AP chemistry but at the same time I don't. I want to talk to him but at the same time I don't. I want to ask him if he is still at his weird point in his life but at the same time I'm scared to know. I'm always so undecided. I always drag everything because I can't seem to decide on anything. Sometimes when I'm shopping it's like I want to buy this shirt but at the same time I don't. I'm always scared that I might make the wrong decision. Like once in physics class he had two go cards and he told me that if I guess which one is his I can have it. It took me literally the entire class. He said even if I'm wrong I can still have it. He even asked me "why are you so scared?" I don't even know. It's like I'm scared but I'm not. My life is so complex yet so simple.

day 8 without you

I am tired. I should sleep but why am I still waiting? Why can't I just accept reality? I don't know why but I missing you a lot today. Maybe it's because now that school is over I have way too much time in hand. It's raining right now. I wonder what you are doing. I wonder if you ever think of me the way I think of you. I just miss you lots right now. I feel like a loser. I should really just stop thinking about it. JHEEZ why are you so hard to forget?

I don't know what to do tomorrow. *sigh OHHH brought daddy a belated birthday gift. Officially poor now D:

roaming around downtown

this was basically my day! LOL In the morning we went to home depot.

Saranghae

“Life is so sad. It’s full of heartbreaks like this. But, I don’t regret a thing; that I met you, that I fell in love with you. If I were to meet you again, even knowing such sadness awaits me, I’d definitely fall in love with you again.” – Mayu

I just finishing watching secret garden. LOL it was such a good drama. OMG I cried watching episode 17 and 18. It was just too sad ): Although the mom was quite annoying in the drama -_-" Happy ending though :) except for that dude :P It was a really fun drama to watch though. I'm going to watch love buffet next. AARON YAN HERE I COME <3

The last few episodes really inspired me. It takes a lot to met that special someone. That right person. I wonder if I met him yet.....

So basically I slept half my day away. Slept at 1 last night and woke up at around 12. I only woke up because I was hungry. And then I practice piano for a bit. Learnt half the song already. I'm getting there :) didn't even know my sister's boyfriend was over.

Petting zoo at the ex!

Good old times in physics 

Our beautiful pancakes and hash browns

and water 

Days well spent

Lets start off with yesterday. Yesterday I went to the ex with Mayanne, Aaron G, Aaron R, Allana, Trisha, Jeff, Mandy and Jessica! It was fun minus the little rain part. I conquered my fears by going on the mega drop. I always wanted to go on it LOL! but every time I get near it I always chicken out D: BUT I DID IT LAST NIGHT!! AND I'M PROUD OF IT !! HEHE :) I wasted like ten dollars playing those games and trying to win those prizes. I swear they are rigged I'm just saying. Some old man said that if I play even if I lose I can have a prize so I went and it was so awkward because he was holding my hand showing me how to play... talk about awkward!! We also brought mini donuts. I should have brought lemonade. Afterwards Trisha's dad drove us back to her place. It was a good day / night.

Sleepover at Trisha's place was awesome! We were going to pull an all nighter! HAHA so much for that. WE fell asleep at like 4 am! At first we were going to sleep in her basement but we saw spiders and one was hanging from the ceiling which was kind of creepy no offence! And so we moved upstairs to her family room. Trisha's mom made soup and pizza for us. We also had cake. I love midnight snakes :) It was such a good experience. In the morning we woke up and made pancakes and hash browns. It was good. Although we burnt some of our pancakes lol! We ate outside enjoying the weather and watching the clouds go by. WE went bus to Sisler for the BBQ thing which was AWKWARD because we were like late and we didn't do much except eat o_O It didn't get too bad afterwards LOL We stop at a park on the way back. LOL back at Trisha's we arm wrestle. (y)

RAIN RAIN GO AWAY COME AGAIN ANOTHER DAY!!

The day we choose to go to the ex it rains.... WOW!! LOL! Anyhow I'm sure that we're going to have a lot of fun. :) It's never a dull moment with them! I hope we don't get sick. I'm excited for the sleepover but at the same time I'm nervous. I never been to one before. Tonight is also my first night ever being away from my parents.  I could tell that my dad is a bit uneasy about it. He kept telling me that after he is willing to pick me up but he never said no to the sleepover because he knows I want to go. I honestly love my dad. He's the greatest.

So much for not thinking about him LOL he message me yesterday and I honestly wasn't expecting it. I must say I admire him. He has great timing. I must say he is a great guy and a great brother too. But sometimes it's just way to hard to understand him or understand what he's thinking about. He seems to change a lot and cannot decide on some things. I give up trying to understand him. It makes things complicated.

UGH! so annoying!!! I have this pimple under my nose and its so annoying!!!! FML!!! -_-"
HAPPY BIRTHDAY Lee Min Ho!!

Ohkaay What the heck man. Its bad enough that I still think about him during the day but last night I had a dream about him. OMGOMGOMG This honestly makes me sound like a creep :S UGGGH!!! Its like I stepped into this hole and no matter how hard I try I can't get myself back out. All those moments still has a way of getting into my mind! Why is it so hard to forget someone? I don't even know if I let go of him or not. I still think about him and all those moments in physics. UGH!!!!! WHAT THE HECK!!! -_-"

Mother was too lazy to cook us lunch today we sister and I walked to McDonalds/KFC. It was a long walk. I think we got lazier. D: This morning I started packing for the sleepover for tomorrow at Trisha's. I should go out more or find a job or something. I need to keep myself busy so I don't think about him. Ohkay, I shall do that. I hope it doesn't rain hardcore tomorrow. That would spoil our plans D:

Time to watch secret garden. :))))))))

starbucks day

HAHAH!! OMG What an ironic day for Mayanne and Andrew today! They plan to wait for each other but ended up not seeing each other!! I also forgot that there were two King Edward stops! Mayanne got off at the earlier one. D: MY BAD

But yea. We went to Starbucks/ Tim Hortons and we meet up with Trisha and Andrew there! We also saw Jacky LOL After that we went back to my place. Just finish watching Secret Garden.

Why is it so hard not to think about someone? Especially someone you got no chance with. Stop thinking about it!! You're only making this hard for yourself. Forget....! Must keep mind off him. Concentrate on dramas. DON'T THINK ABOUT HIM! KK!! Going to go sleep. Stop waiting for him to talk to you. He won't. It's over before it even started. Just let go and pretend that it never happened. Erase and delete.

IT's 11:11. I wonder how he did on his biology exam. Day 3 without you

BEAST - ON Rainy Days

I love this song. :))

Happy Father's Day everyone :D ♥

Happy Father's Day. I love you forever. I'm sorry I didn't agree with you to do that swimming crap. If you want to know the truth I honestly don't want too. I feel bad always going against you all the time. You always yell at me but I know that deep down inside you love us a lot. And I love you too dad. Thanks for giving me everything I have right now. And please get well soon. Sorry that you are sick today.

Went to cousins today. We were playing slap jack and literally I was the only one losing.. WOW I fail at card games! LOL :D

Me and sister went to polo park after. OMG saw Kim working today!! AHAH She always seem so happy. I really admire her for that (Y) We walked her to new york fries. OMG I brought a new bag today. I am poor now. LOL! oh well. I shall try and get a job HAHA

OMG

As if he messaged me on msn last night! OMMMGG but then he went offline. Why does he always have to do that? Like really? It's like he's popping in and out of my life. He is way too hard to predict.. Well today is the beginning of days without him. Day 1

I am loving life right now LOL! Woke up this morning and play computer/ piano. I'm trying to learn perfect love right now :) Its complicated in a way but I got through the first line. Went to grandma's after. Me and sister went to the YMCA to work out. Well we kind of did. We played basketball for a bit and then we went jogging! Got food from dad's afterwards lol!

Kay, is it just me or is it burning hot in this house? EW LOL I thought I had to do that swimming crap today but guessed not. Dad went and got 80% of the money back. I felt bad in a way. I guess I over reacted. I wasted 30 bucks...

0330 PIANO

I'm trying to learn this and it's like super hard. Well only the left hand part. The right hand part isn't a problem for me. It's the left hand! It's so hard to stay in rhythm!

Secret Garden

I wish my life was like a drama. Then I can just skip to the last episode and see if this is all worth it..


I'm back into my drama mode again. I started watching Korean drama secret garden today and I  love it. It's really good so far and it's funny! 


My physics exam wasn't too bad today. I wish I studied off the test more instead of the textbook because half of the questions on the exam were questions from our test... -_-" I was really surprised today because he said good luck to me before the exam. I honestly wasn't expecting anything from him. I just wanted to see him today. After today I don't know when he'll ever talk to me again. I guess the end is actually really today. I'm going to miss him. HAHA I was cleaning out my binder and I came across this ( the picture on the left) I remember playing tic tac toe with him. Good times <3 I wonder if I'll have any classes with him next year. I wanted to say good luck to him too today but when I saw him my words got lost, like always. There is something about him that always drags me back. I wonder what he is doing right now.  


Two more suffering days for me. I can make it. Screw this swimming thing because of it I have to wake up early!! 

I honestly should move on. It's obvious that he is with someone else. I accept that but parts of me still waits for him. I still go on msn but only appearing online to him. I used to do that all the time that way when the light blinks I always know that it would be him and only him. Probably all the time I spend waiting for him he's probably talking to someone else. It hurts when I think about it that way.... It's not that easy to just let go you know. I mean after an entire semester with him. It's really hard. It really is.

I am seriously going to fail my physics exam tomorrow. It's impossible for me to relearn an entire semester worth of physics. No joke. Why is my life so tragic? FML ! I honestly understand nothing!! ITS SO FRUSTRATING!!!!! -_-"